And all that I can see, is just another lemon tree.

Dear God,

I was sitting down and suddently it came to me. Maybe again you’re trying to show me something.

I was pondering again about this boy, not someone I fancy but someone who’s kept me strangely more interested than others. He’s a student in my class. And you know, the students in my class have -since the very beginning- kept my mind buzzing and as narrow minded as it seems made me see into a newer light -one that was less than paved in gold.

In each of them I just really want to know why and how they got into that class, why they aren’t alike more academicly-conscious students because I recognize some of my new friends are students coming  from the last few classes in the previous years. So after time I’ve learnt their stories, as much as I could and well, now most of them are closed cases already. I understand and the pieces fit as far as I’ve learnt.

But you know God, with this guy I always draw a blank. I really hope that this interest in him will somehow help me to affect him. I want him to realize the value of this life, and education being one of a very supporting roles to a brilliant one. I’m sure many will agree with this. And definitely in a long shot even bring him to you. Anyway, I’m not getting to other kinds of interests with him. You would know anyway. But maybe to some this all up, the things I’ve been going through for this period of time -recently will help me relate to all of their situations. Maybe. There’s always a reason for any rhyme with you, that’s what I love about you. I mean, even if there isn’t one in an obvious way I know its always for the good, that’s good enough of a justification already isn’t it? Definitely.

I know you God, but I can’t see the intense blue when clouds are at the view -I realize who you are yet I can’t catch the vastness of what only you can see. Does that makes sense? I don’t know why I find myself getting into these situations, and getting so intrigued by it, but only you do and you see it so well.

Alright, before I close this finger-tapping number I just want to say that I’ve got only you to trust with the CF of my school. For now,there isn’t anyone to take it up when I’m gone next year and it’s all I think about some days. I’m trusting that with all that you’ve done here, you’re just not about to stop now. Thank you..

 

Auf wiedersehen.

 

Liebe,

Lei

If love is all we ever needed

Dear God,

My mum asked me, ‘why did God make man so evil?’

I think that its cause you wanted to make it possible for us to have the Complete ability to extend our feelings through our actions.So u made it possible for us to be evil to the very fibre of our nails at the same time to be perfectly good all in one flick of the mind.

You made it so that its all up to us.

Dear God,

 Will it hurt you if I’d say I wish you hadn’t given me the choice? How do i tell you that I’m so hurt by myself. Does that makes sense? I messed up and have been messing up bad. With words on a water-slide and emotions that hit and run. No matter what, at the end of the day, I have only myself to blame. Tell me how its going to be, it will work out for good won’t it? It will..

 

There should never be a day when people say all hope is lost.

 

 

Searching myself,

Lei